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When we were young…

9/27/00 Tomorrow I leave for Torino.  I’m saying goodbye for now to a life that might completely disappear.  Saying goodbye not just the home I’ve known for so long, but to a love that will be missed.

14/1/01 Awoke at 10am, took a shower, did some emailing, had a coffee with Fabio who works downstairs at the flower shop and went to Cafe Des Arte to study Italian.  My hands are cold, writing is a little difficult, the weather bites.   Feelings are all over the place.  The heart is strange, the rest is alright.

… I need a heater 98.6 6/2/01..

Going to Milan to see Makita

21/6/01 … The mind has taken over…  I’m expecting something incredible to happen… All this bullshit… I have to take some pictures.  It saves me from myself and I need some refuge.

Projects for when I return: Self-portraits senza faccia Portraits of friends Gestation – a book about the process Paintings with photos Polaroid portraits (mixed media) Quad shots (me & Torino) Samantha – portraits of peculiar beauty high contrast shots portraits of strangers nudes?

check in suitcase under where top handle is w/ towel film kodak box w/ camera bag in polaroid camera in ritz box 2 film in purse pocket

June 25th Now I smell your scent, I wanna turn my head.  Choking, I’m afraid to be harsh.  My legs crash to the ground.  That was the last time.  Desperation is ugly.  Control yourself. It’s too hot in this city. I’m losing my mind.  Help.

ITS SNOWING OUTSIDE AND DAYDREAMS SLIP INTO MY MIND AS HIS HAND SLIPS INTO MINE AND NOW WERE WALKING TOGETHER THROUGH WHITE FIELDS AND IT FEELS LIKE HEAVEN.

7/4/02 I should start to think about what I like, I’m beginning to forget.  Nature in the daytime, city at night.  Should I move to Paris?  So much going on all at once.  Almost 23 years old.  I thought by now it would have all worked itself out.  Livin in a dream world, thinking up someone else’ dream.

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